How Modern Lifestyles Impact Relationships:  Understanding the Rise of Singledom in the 20s and 30s

By Sanchia Saunders

Introduction: Traditional Paths Redefined by Modern Values

Love, House, Marriage, Babies was once the blueprint that people followed when it came to ‘making it’ and ‘succeeding’ in life. With young people almost being praised and encouraged when they followed these ideals, it found many men and women, in the past, living out the rest of their days conforming to the rigid stereotypes set by society, of being the traditional housewife or working husband.

The Shift in Cultural Norms Influenced by Generational Changes

Despite social media personality Nara Smith clutching onto this blueprint with both hands and a firm grip, these ideals are beginning to diminish. As no more are women singing, ‘yes I do the cooking yes I do the cooking’, or men singing working 9 till 5 what a way to make a living, young people particularly who are in their 20’s and 30’s are now creating their own identities and reshaping the ideals that will make up their future one day.

Career vs. Love: A Modern Dilemma

However, by the looks of things, this isn't being done by young people following their hearts or relying on a relationship to carry themselves through life, as reports from Zety state that 75% of people would sacrifice their romantic relationship/marriage for a successful career. This sums up why so many young people are still single, as statistics from The Hill state that nearly half of all young adults are single: 34 percent of women, and a whopping 63 percent of men, which suggests that career progression, stability, and personal progression are what's fuelling young people and their happiness instead of the uncertainties of love.

The Evolution of Independence in Dating

Two of the main reasons for this is down to stability and control. This is because if you look back to more traditional traits and values men were once the breadwinners and women stayed at home, however now in many industries this role has now reversed. This highlights the increased singledom between the ages of 20 - 30 as women no longer have to rely on men to provide, as they are now able to do it themselves, therefore having more control on their present and future/ enabling security.

The Rich Aunty Effect: Choosing Independence Over Conformity

With women financially now being in their prime, with some of them having multiple sources of income, they are now focused on their independence as opposed to being tied down. This has meant that instead of seeking love, marriage, and a baby in the carriage they are opting to be the rich aunty instead.

Social Media and the Celebration of Singlehood

The rich aunt, which is a phrase that we have seen blown up on social medias like TikTok where a video by creator adorable _caro titled ‘Me as the single rich aunt’ sums up the life of a rich aunt. This basically consists of independence, wealth, traveling, partying, and choosing you over love. The video which generated over 23k likes gave the poignant message of, ‘Don't get married, f*** till you drop and then just buy a house’, and this is exactly what many women are choosing to do today.

The Darker Side of Love: The Emotional Cost of Independence

Despite more and more young people choosing themselves over love, it has shed light on the darker, more lonely sides of singledom. This is because some singles have been scared from past experiences such as failed relationships, heartbreak, and divorce that it puts people off from looking for love, and giving up altogether. A tweet from Heidi N. Moore, who received a lot of love on X states that, ‘I keep seeing women say they've stopped dating and they're staying single, and it's because they've been traumatised by men in the past and have no desire to face the demoralising trauma of The Apps’.

Conclusion: Reflecting on Single Life in Modern Society

Therefore, with some women being afraid to find love again or be reintroduced to the idea of love, what can be done to help. As nobody deserves to be lonely out of fear, or rejection, or heartbreak. This is because everyone is beautiful and special in their own way. However, what do you think about being single in your 20’s? Head to our Instagram to give your opinion.

Credits:

• Zety:  Unveiling the Dynamics of A-Players vs. B-Players
• The Hill:  Insights into the Singlehood: A Gender Perspective
• Washington Post: Money Matters in Love: The Role of Finances in Modern Relationships
• Glamour:  The Rise of Solo Living: Why Women Are Opting Out of the Dating Scene